Tuesday, January 3, 2012

It's Oh So Quiet

Almost too quiet.  I just got back from dropping off the kids at school for their first day back from Christmas break.  And I actually feel a little sad, which is good, because that means I wasn't so frazzled and tired and stressed that I couldn't wait for school to start up again.   I am, however, glad to be back to a schedule and structure and the chance to run errands by myself or get things done when I can be really productive.  Or just a chance to ride the exercise bike without 17 interruptions.

We had a good morning and the kids were both at school on time.  Ben and I had to wait for a minute or two for the teachers to show up at the dropoff area, which suited him fine, because he did not want to be back at school today.  The biggest issue was the fact that he had to leave his little Fisher-Price girl with me instead of keeping it with him.  That lead to a traumatic separation.  Then he decided that focusing on the zipper of my coat was a good idea.  I think he decided that focusing on the zipper would just make it all go away.

Minor fit when I handed him over, but by the time I drove by to leave the parking lot, he had a smile on his face.  Hopefully he enjoys his time back.

We found out over Christmas break that Ben has been having some issues in the church nursery with being aggressive towards other kids, pulling hair and grabbing at their faces, etc.  Not really sure how to prevent that as we still can't have a conversation with him about appropriate behavior and set down expectations.  We pretty much have to deal with things in the moment.  It would have been if they had kept us informed instead of just dumping it on us that he'd had some problems in the past (including an incident during the Christmas Eve service this year, which lead to us finding out that he'd had other run-ins).

The main thing that comes to mind is that certain things are triggers for him to act out physically - if it's really loud all of a sudden or if a child is crying or screaming, if someone gets in his face, if someone tries to take a toy - but those are things that are difficult if not impossible to prevent in an environment like a church nursery.  He's been doing well at school and I think there's just been one incidence of him trying to hit another child during snack time.  He was removed from snack time and was all done, and that seemed to make enough of an impression on him that it hasn't happened again.

I'm not sure how they prevent aggression at his preschool, which has a mix of developmentally delayed children and typically developing children.  I think I'm going to e-mail his teacher, though, and see if she has any tips that I can pass along.

I really don't like starting out the new year with this kind of stress and anxiety, not knowing if he'll keep up with the behavior and if we'll be told at some point that he can't be in the nursery anymore - or if one of us will always need to be in there with him to monitor things.